This is it

I've had my head in the wet mud many times in life.

Since I was 12, I think I knew that this would be a bumpy ride.

Then it turned into exactly what I expected, but something I could never predict.

Now I'm back to being fine.

Im okay with everything that's been happening.

4 days ago, I wasn't.

I was angry

Sad

Just asking why me. 

Why me?

Well, I got my answer:

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Because I think God really wouldn't give me anything that I couldn't handle.

I know I rarely bring up spiritual or religious matters to this blog, but I do have my beliefs and I try my hardest to stick to them.

But gosh, I really couldn't understand why everything had fallen in place the way it did.

Today, around 5:37 pm,

I found myself reading old letters from friends and family and love.

I read em all.

From 2002, I read the confessions, testimonials, and secrets of all these people who care (some cared) about me and it got me level headed.

I've always had people to love me, even when I thought the opposite.

So, Im back to it. Doing what I need to do, while trying out new things.

For one, I'm going to do something I've never thought to attempt, but I'll have fun nonetheless.

I'm going to be sober. I'm going to take this destructive energy I've cultivated and use it for positivity.

I'm going to do other things and throw myself back into old activities and new passions.

So, for one, expect more posts, and secondly, prepare to see progress.

I'll document all the temptation I'll encounter during this mission of course.

Later Days, Longer Nights