Ego/Id/Superego

There is no even capacity

You're either more soul or intellectual

You have both, you just have an upper on one

No one had to tell me, but I'm more soul

I'm more crazy

Pushing the boundaries of my impulse's dissent

Who do you want to be
Who you are
Fine line that can be crossed with a single drink

As famously put, our Ego is the rider atop the brazen, bucking mustang we have called Id

Keep it in check, until the check becomes a problem
Then let loose

Here's Mr. Campbell with some more vivid imagery:

"Atonement consists in no more than the abandonment of that self-generated double monster—the dragon thought to be God (superego) and the dragon thought to be Sin (repressed id)"

And as Mr. Doyle says:

"When the superego’s judgment is no longer powerful enough to annihilate us and the id is accepted by the ego without fear, our wholeness is restored, our place in the cosmos is found, and we are free."

I've been riding my Id for a long time up until the beginning of January
And as Doyle puts it, you find wholeness when your ego accepts the id

While riding my id, I kept giving myself false acceptance
Acceptance that my ego would reluctantly take due to my id being out of control
Acceptance that my id would (gladly) take because it got to do what it wanted

Acceptance my superego never accepted,
a denial which led to hidden guilt

Only silver lining I could grab from all this was that since it came from me
Only I could fix it

I traded a bit more of my soul to my brain in exchange for stability
Still crazy as shit though, dont get me wrong
And stability doesn't come with airtight safety that makes you triple-guess everything
or
taking less chances because a risk's reward is still a risk's possession
No no..
Stability is thinking about everyone else

While I can confirm that I exist, I can't say that anything else really does
But just in case you are all real too,
we gotta share this space

Long as we know we don't truly own anything
My mustang can keep at rest

Later Days, Longer Nights